No matter how much we reassured him it was safe, he wouldn't get on board. I was amazed that he didn't believe us, the people he can trust most. Even when we got on the train and smiled and waved for him to join us, he still wouldn't budge. He shook his head and said: "Nope!"
He loves trains, so I knew how much he was missing. When he hears a train crossing the trestle above the river behind our house, he shouts with excitement and runs to the window to watch it. When it has passed, he cries. He lives and breathes trains.
At the museum I wanted him to get over his fear and climb up those steps and take a look from the inside out. I wanted him to trust me when I reached out my hand. This was his chance to get on board and experience it firsthand. When would he get this opportunity again?
It occurred to me, when God brings me close to my dream and says: "Get on board!" I sometimes act like my two-year-old. I look right and left at the big, scary opportunity, I hear the wheels chugging and the steam blowing and my heart pounds within my chest. I feel that nasty panic rise up in my throat and I shake my head and say an emphatic "Nope!"
Then God reaches out His hand to me and says gently, "Come on. Trust me. This is your dream."
I shake my head, not willing to budge from my safety zone. The fear continues to whisper all the possibilities of failure, pain and trouble if I get on board.
But God doesn't give up. "You can trust me more than anyone else. I'll never leave your side. I want you to see this dream from the inside out. Come on board, I'm about to give you the ride of a lifetime, if you'll take that step and follow me."
I want to believe Him. I do. I want to get on board. I want to feel it and touch it and smell it. I want to see where it will take me. I want to see if it's everything I dreamed it would be. I've heard that whistle calling and I've watched it go by with joy and pleasure. I live and breathe my dream.
When I get up close, though, and fear strikes my heart, it seems so much easier to return to safety. The fear is shouting at me to walk away.
But I learned something a long time ago that my two-year-old has yet to learn: I can get on board, even when I'm afraid. I have a choice to make. Fear cannot force me to walk away, unless I let it. When I walk toward my dream and resist the fear, it begins to subsides.
And when I'm finally on board and I see the steam building up and feel the rumble of the engines going, my heart begins to pound with a different emotion: exhilaration. I'm living the dream and it's better than I ever imagined.
I look over and see God sitting next to me. He's watching my face as I experience this thing He created for me and me alone. He is smiling. So am I.
Beautiful analogy. I especially love the phrase about fear whispering "all the possibilities of failure, pain and trouble." When I've allowed those whispers to grow stronger and louder than God's encouraging words, I always regret it.
ReplyDeleteLove the encouraging ending. It is a great reminder our God is bigger than our fears.
You're right, Ava, the fear starts as a whisper and if we don't resist it at the beginning, it becomes louder and louder, blocking out God's still small voice.
DeleteSuch a great post! Loved it!
ReplyDeleteThanks, Amy. ;)
DeleteWonderful comparison, Gabrielle. Beautiful. I often let fear instead of trust rule my life. But I love the idea of getting on board, even if we are afraid. So true! Thank you!
ReplyDeleteThanks for stopping by, Heidi. I've found that anything worth doing usually has to be done while we're overcoming the fear that wants us to back away. We need to do it afraid, or we may never do it at all!
DeleteGod tells us, point blank, "I did not give you a spirit of fear".
ReplyDeleteFear is not an attribute of God. Nor is it a by product of blessings.
BUT, it is a crippling tool, isn't it?
We have to remember that Jesus is our point man.
*I* Have to remember that!!
Fear sweeps our eyes away from His will. But think of the phrase "blind trust". Close your eyes to what is frightening you, take His hand, and put one foot in front of the other.
Amen! I love 2 Timothy 1:7. Fear is a learned behavior and not something given to us by God. Faith, on the other hand, has been given to us as a small seed. The more we tend to it, the more it will grow. Taking a step of faith (or hundreds) is the only way to follow God. Hebrews 11:6 - without faith it is impossible to please God...I feel another blog post coming on. :)
DeleteI love that! When we finally put our trust in God, it's funny how those fears which seemed so big become so small.
ReplyDeleteYes! It's also funny how one thing can be easy for one person and riddled with fear for another. My son was struck by fear, but his sisters were not, when facing the same opportunity. As a parent I know what things trouble each of my children and I'll be purposeful to work on those things with them. God is the same way.
DeleteLove this, Gabe! It's so true that the unknown can be scary, but with God right next to us, we can venture forward. I know he's opened doors for me I've been afraid to walk through, or I do and kind of stand there mouth agape saying, "What do I do now?!" But He is faithful. He takes me and walks with me.
ReplyDeleteThe unknown is scary, especially when we've put something on a pedestal like my son had with the trains and I've done with a dream. We think about it, imagine all the possibilities and what it could mean in our lives, but when we come face to face with it, we're filled with fear and doubt - but God is faithful and will never leave our side!!
DeleteBeautiful, Gabrielle! It's interesting that you say fear whispers. That's certainly how it starts, but eventually it's yelling so loud that it drowns out all common sense. That's when I start saying Scripture out loud. Thanks for your wonderful analogy today!
ReplyDeleteYou're absolutely right, Donna. It starts as a whisper and soon turns to a shout if we don't resist it at the outset. I love Scripture and I know it's our most powerful weapon. When you look at Ephesians 6:10-18 we see the full armor of God - faith, truth, salvation, peace and righteousness are given to protect us - but the Sword of the Spirit (or the Word of God) is our only weapon, but it's mighty to the pulling down of strongholds (2 Corinthians 10:4).
DeleteThis is so awesome, Gabe! I'm actually the kind of person who's totally willing to jump onto the train...but it tends to be once I'm on that I get scared. :) I love it when God says, "Hold on, Melissa. Trust me. Remember I'm the one driving this thing."
ReplyDeleteI've been there, too! I'm all ready to get on board, but once I see what I've done I start to feel the fear. This reminds me of child bearing! I was all ready and willing, but as soon as I saw that positive test result the fear hits and I think: What in the world did I just do!?!? :) That's when God reassures me He's by my side all the way and I have nothing to fear! And now I have four beautiful little people who call me Mama.
DeleteLove this analogy! Watching our kids and our relationship with them is so much like our relationship with our Father in Heaven. Even the kicking and screaming, ha! We just do it internally :)
ReplyDeleteI've been known to have an external fit once and a while! Maybe not kicking and screaming, but crying and pouting, for sure. :) I have learned so much about my relationship with God since becoming a parent.
DeleteWhat a beautiful metaphor, Gabrielle! I've seen the same kind of irrational fear in my kids, and that's just what it is...irrational. Hmm, I wonder who they learned it from? :)
ReplyDeleteSometimes I see a behavior in my children and I feel so sad knowing who they got it from... :)
DeleteThis was fabulous and such a stark reminder that God is bigger than our fears. Thank you for seeing God in your day and sharing His wisdom with us! I needed this!
ReplyDeleteThank you for the encouraging words, Sherrinda. I was sitting on my deck the other day pondering the whole event and God showed me it wasn't much different than what I've done in the past. I ran inside, pulled out the laptop and my fingers flew across the keys. I love when God uses real life lessons to teach us something from the Spirit.
DeleteThis is beautiful! Love the analogy. And yep, I've been there so many times - heart pounding, fears winning. And while I know I've missed a few opportunities along the way, I'm thankful there are far more times I've placed my trembling hand in God's and let Him take me into that dream. What great adventures He and I have had.
ReplyDeleteYes, He takes our trembling hands and guides us every step of the way. Fear is the enemies choice tool to prevent us from folling God's best in our lives, but I love that we have what it takes to overcome fear and go where God wills.
DeleteBeautiful analogy, Gabrielle. Your post is encouraging to my own situation -- I've got on board, I'm waiting expectantly, and trying to do everything I can to minister to my family and please the Lord. :-) Isn't it amazing how much kids can teach us about faith? I never understood why Jesus said we must become like little children till I became a mother. Thanks for blessing me with your story. :-)
ReplyDeleteThank you, Gwen. I love the story of Jesus bringing the little children to his side and encouraging us to become like them. I've learned a lot about God since having children and it's so much easier to understand His unconditional love for us. Thanks for stopping by! I'm continuing to pray for you guys and your transitions. I'm so happy that even though you've moved physically, you're still here in the blogosphere!
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